Author Topic: Worst last line?  (Read 7144 times)

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Offline Gatz

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Worst last line?
« on: January 14, 2011, 11:36 PM »
I tried to think of the worst possible LAST line for a story. Here's what I came up with:


"Breath mint?" she asked.


Does anyone else have a stinker last line?


Gatz


EricJ

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #1 on: January 15, 2011, 12:24 AM »
"Well, that didn't work."

(Which reminds of one joke that was on the forums during the pre-release Harry Potter/Deathly Hallows mania:
Since everyone was sick to screaming death of "How will they end it?" threads, some fans tried a different approach:  "What do you guess the last word of HP7 will be?"
That let some fans make guesses like "train", "Hogwarts", "scar", etc....My guess for the last word of the Harry vs. Voldemort book?:  "...Oops."  )

Offline ruecole

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #2 on: January 15, 2011, 01:00 AM »
"And they all lived happily ever after."

or

"Then everybody died."

or

"It was all a dream."

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Offline Ree

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #3 on: January 15, 2011, 05:16 AM »
I love this thread!

Susan

Offline MaryWitzl

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #4 on: January 15, 2011, 05:43 AM »
I vote for 'They all lived happily ever after'. That used to bore me to death as a kid.

'To be continued' was the ending I always resorted to. I knew it was wrong, but it was just so easy.

Offline Franzilla

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #5 on: January 15, 2011, 06:01 AM »
My daughter loves 'And they all lived happily ever after' !!! But I'm not sure if it's the meaning or the rhythm of it that she likes. The 'happily ever after' has that nice ba-ba-ba bum-ba bum-ba rhythm.

My least favorite would have to be something like:

No one really understood what had happened.  or

And no one ever found out the answer. or

She never found out that he loved her.

Offline MaryWitzl

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #6 on: January 15, 2011, 07:15 AM »
What I didn't like about happily ever after was that it seemed to deny any possibility of future excitement or fun. I always wanted more scope there -- like, "They all got along pretty well after that, even when there was a big typhoon which caused a massive tsunami and the princesses had to be evacuated in a fishing boat."  I wanted to know that the protagonists I'd come to love would be happy and safe -- but not doomed to a life of uneventful pleasantness.


Offline Franzilla

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #7 on: January 15, 2011, 07:26 AM »
He he he, Mary. 'uneventful pleasantness' I read 'happily ever after' as including many adventures, excitements and joys... But I totally get what you mean too, especially when the final image is of a plastic-looking princess with a plastic-looking prince and two doting parents smiling proudly, as though all they ever wanted for their son/daughter was to get married. So yup, I gets it.

Offline ChristineSarmel

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #8 on: January 15, 2011, 07:40 AM »
"But I married him anyway, because I knew true love would change him."


Offline MaryWitzl

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #9 on: January 15, 2011, 07:45 AM »
But I totally get what you mean too, especially when the final image is of a plastic-looking princess with a plastic-looking prince and two doting parents smiling proudly, as though all they ever wanted for their son/daughter was to get married. So yup, I gets it.
 That's exactly what I saw: doting adults surrounding a smiling couple, everybody mindlessly thrilled with everybody else -- and no more adventures!

"But I married him anyway, because I knew true love would change him."
 Hahahaha!  We're all warned, but who doesn't believe this even just a tiny bit?

Offline olmue

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #10 on: January 15, 2011, 08:16 AM »
"But I married him anyway, because I knew true love would change him."

Lol!

I think the worst kind of ending is the one that skips over the climax altogether. Or even worse--one that doesn't HAVE a climax:

And if only the two had met, they would have fought off the Dark Lord and won peace for their people. They would have finally found the soul mate they had searched for all their lives. They would have found meaning in rebuilding peace. But alas, they managed to miss each other in the marketplace, due to one of them tripping over a stray cat, and so in the end, nothing happened whatsoever. Nothing, nothing, nothing. The end.

Offline Pons

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #11 on: January 15, 2011, 09:32 AM »
There was no hope.

Offline Stephanie Ruble

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #12 on: January 15, 2011, 10:24 AM »
Then the aliens landed and nothing else mattered.

The End.
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Offline Franzilla

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #13 on: January 15, 2011, 10:32 AM »
Pons, ouch. Christine, double ouch.

Offline Auntybooks

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #14 on: January 15, 2011, 10:51 AM »
Okay it is more than a line, but hey:

As our lips met at last, I thought, "Wait! This guy has no heartbeat. No body heat. Lips as cold as meat slabs suck!"
 :laugh


hee hee


EricJ

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #15 on: January 15, 2011, 11:06 AM »
My least favorite would have to be something like:

No one really understood what had happened.  or

And no one ever found out the answer. or

She never found out that he loved her.

And y'know, there's probably some latent cynical contempt that 9-yo. girls, writing their first stories for kid's-magazine contests and deliberately trying to sound like "grownup" kids' stories, will invariably end it with:
 "But what she learned was more important, she had found a friend."
« Last Edit: January 15, 2011, 11:08 AM by EricJ »

Offline Melissa K

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #16 on: January 15, 2011, 11:41 AM »
I'm with EricJ. I hate moralizing endings:


Never again did Johnny disobey his mother.

Or

"You were right, Dad. I should be more grateful for the opportunities I have in my life. I am sorry I was so selfish and disrespectful."

Or

And that, dear reader, is how Charlie learned that cheating doesn't pay.

Offline Melissa K

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #17 on: January 15, 2011, 11:57 AM »
And that, dear reader, is how Julie learned never to drop garbage down the hole in the Honey Bucket.

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #18 on: January 15, 2011, 12:26 PM »
As our lips met at last, I thought, "Wait! This guy has no heartbeat. No body heat. Lips as cold as meat slabs suck!"
 :laugh

I have to disagree, Aimee! Best last line ever!!  :dr
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Offline pengwinz

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #19 on: January 15, 2011, 12:45 PM »
I'm assuming these are mostly made up, right? (<-no, that's not it)

How about:

But then I woke up and saw that it had all been a dream, just a very bad dream.

or:

On the other hand, maybe it didn't happen that way.

or:

Unfortunately for Samantha Hargrove, the toilet overflowed.

Offline MaryWitzl

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #20 on: January 15, 2011, 12:58 PM »
My God, these are great. I want to read books with all of these worst endings!

Offline 1846

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #21 on: January 15, 2011, 03:28 PM »
And so Jason and Emily never had sex again.

Offline pengwinz

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #22 on: January 15, 2011, 05:05 PM »
Chad held his finger to Sabrina's nose and said, "Does this smell to you?"

jenniferfisher

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #23 on: January 15, 2011, 06:30 PM »
"I wonder what this shiny red button is for?"
The End

Offline Franzilla

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #24 on: January 15, 2011, 06:56 PM »
pengwinz, sorry, but that line doesn't work as a worst last line at all! I'd laugh my head off and be a happy reader if that came at the end of a book! Hilarious.

amykated

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #25 on: January 15, 2011, 07:15 PM »
 It looked like they kissed, but I couldn't be sure (my eyes were still teared up from Robert's atomic nacho fart).

Offline SarahE

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #26 on: January 15, 2011, 07:25 PM »

On the other hand, maybe it didn't happen that way.


Pengwinz - this wins for me, hands down. It completely disregards the entire book you just read! Talk about an anti-climax  :lol2
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Offline J.Ro

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #27 on: January 15, 2011, 08:00 PM »


But tomorrow, tomorrow would be a new day, bright and sunny and full of endless possibility.

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EricJ

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #28 on: January 15, 2011, 08:27 PM »
How about the one you always got in those Choose Your Own Adventure books, and never knew whether you'd taken the right path?:

"The villain may have gotten away...But NEXT time we'll be ready for him!"

Offline Melissa K

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Re: Worst last line?
« Reply #29 on: January 15, 2011, 08:51 PM »
Quote
But tomorrow, tomorrow would be a new day, bright and sunny and full of endless possibility.

J.Ro, I love this! That is, I would totally hate it if I were reading that book. Yet I feel compelled to add to it. I hope you don't mind the extra detail here:


But tomorrow, tomorrow would be a new day, bright and sunny and full of endless possibility under the watchful eyes of our zombie overlords.
« Last Edit: January 15, 2011, 08:53 PM by Melissa K »