SCBWI's Blueboard - A Message & Chat Board

Genres & Age Categories => Picture Books (PB) => Topic started by: Denise M. Cassano on June 02, 2017, 12:35 PM

Title: Rhyming Question- getting into the weeds
Post by: Denise M. Cassano on June 02, 2017, 12:35 PM
I looked at the rhyming primer and links but did not see this addressed.
In a picture book, if you are using iambic pentameter (where the second syllable is stressed) like:

 "The TIME has COME for ONE last TIP"

My question is, on a particular page or verse, is it acceptable to have two lines of iambic pentameter, then change to two lines of trochaic pentameter, where the second syllable is stressed like:

"LOUDer, LONGer, FASTer, HIGHer"

I'm looking for examples of this but I don't see any. The ones I have read all stayed the same, so  I wondered if that  would be 'frowned' upon.
When reading my work out loud makes sense but not having a lot of experience in this, I didn't want to make a rookie mistake.
Thanks to all with any insight.


Title: Re: Rhyming Question- getting into the weeds
Post by: dkshumaker on June 03, 2017, 11:54 AM
I don't have any specific titles right now, but I am certain that some books have "refrains" that might be a different meter than the rest of the text. If I find some titles later today, I'll jump back in.

But sometimes it's good to change the "mood" of the text by changing the meter, so as long as you have a good reason to, I think you'll be OK.

Good luck!
Title: Re: Rhyming Question- getting into the weeds
Post by: JodyJS on June 03, 2017, 03:24 PM
I agree with dkshumaker. Planned change is fine in rhyming works and can even add a nice break from the usual pattern, BUT only if it's planned and not random change. Yours sounds like it's fine, imho.
Title: Re: Rhyming Question- getting into the weeds
Post by: Vijaya on June 03, 2017, 04:25 PM
The same rhythm for 32 pages can get very tedious. It's great when you can break it into a different pattern that is pleasing to the ear. Your ex. works. Good luck with this. V.
Title: Re: Rhyming Question- getting into the weeds
Post by: Denise M. Cassano on June 04, 2017, 07:47 AM
Interesting replies- I was thinking the same thing- to strategically change the cadence, and repeat this change as a pattern.  And as you said, make it purposeful.   I think the whole book with the same exact meter can get tedious as well. As always- thanks!
Title: Re: Rhyming Question- getting into the weeds
Post by: DianaM on June 04, 2017, 03:38 PM
Yes, that is permitted. It's all about how it sounds. That variation is particularly common when the previous line has a feminine ending (ie., ends with an extra unstressed syllable).

I wrote a bit about this in a blog post: "Revise Like a Pirate" https://rhymerev.com/2017/04/25/rhyme-revolution-2017-day-17-diana-murray-revise-like-a-pirate/
Title: Re: Rhyming Question- getting into the weeds
Post by: Debbie Vilardi on June 04, 2017, 09:22 PM
Sound alone may not be a good enough reason for it. Have a story reason to change the rhythm. This can include a specific character talking for all of the changed lines, or a change in mood or tone.