• One of the following is a lie:

    1. Growing up, Heather Breed Steadham’s fondest dream was to be a cast member on Saturday Night Live. Her actual brushes with fame have been singing and dancing onstage with the Beach Boys at Caesar’s Palace and meeting Janet Jackson’s secret husband in 1994, talking him into giving the Girls Club group she was chaperoning twenty second-row tickets.
    2. Heather Breed Steadham is a high school English teacher who spent four years in Italy, where she traveled extensively, sampling donut-like confections from Istanbul to Berlin and avoiding what has since been explained to her was the world’s best coffee.
    3. Heather Breed Steadham, mother of three, wife of one, got her MFA in creative writing in 2017 and wants more than anything to be a writer.
    4. Heather Breed Steadham likes asparagus.

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